The Good Fight.
Yes, this is from Paul. For those of you who aren’t familiar with the New Testament, his last name is “of Tarsus.” “Fight the good fight.” And then before he’s killed he says, “I have fought the good fight. I have finished my course. I have kept the faith.” (1 Timothy 6:12 & 2 Timothy 4:7)
Is this a religious blog? Sometimes. I believe in God, so surely that’ll be part. I have some things with him I want to work out. I must quit putting that off. But religion or no, it’s about the good fight. Life is a struggle and a crazy adventure. At least for me. And learning how to navigate this world and live well is on ongoing work.
I am all about perspective. Someone said, “If you want to change how you feel, change how you see.” I have struggled with depression off and on through life and from where I’m at right now, it seems that depression is myopic. You’re so wrapped up you can’t see…or breathe. My medication is working right now so I can say that. When I’m fully depressed, I feel like I’m seeing reality. I’m quite interested in brain chemistry so I have words to say on that too. (Keep at it, all you neuroscientists. We’re cheering you on.)
And yes, I’m blogging anonymously. I can not do otherwise. I am an introvert (ah…who’d have guessed?) and I’m already a little scared about feedback. So this is brave enough for me. I have read a lot of blogs. I am amazed at people’s strength. What could they all do if united toward something? Change the world, I think. Maybe I can carry the water.
I’ll tell this much for now – my genesis into this world came through a rape and my courageous mother refused an abortion offered to her. She gave me to some good parents. I took this learning very matter-of-factly but now that I’m older, it seems to matter more. There is something I haven’t figured out and I am going to soon.
I adopted children as well. Of course that helped precipitate my retrospection. Foster care and adoption have been a big part of our family. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. It’s part of fighting the good fight.
C. S. Lewis wrote, “It may be hard for an egg to turn into a bird: it would be a jolly sight harder for it to learn to fly while remaining an egg. We are like eggs at present. And you cannot go on indefinitely being just an ordinary, decent egg. We must be hatched or go bad.” I laughed when I read that. I know he’s right.
Anyway, my goal is to be hatched. Someone tell me when I am.